Wednesday, December 20, 2006

Andrea's Rules for Ballet Etiquette...

I took the twins to another Christmas ballet this past weekend. We enjoyed it, but it has come to my attention that certain members of the general public do not know the do's and don'ts of attending a ballet performance. I am taking the liberty to enlighten them. (Actually, I doubt any of that public will read this blog, but in order to get this off of my chest, I am going to write)!!!

1.) THOU SHALL ARRIVE AT THE THEATER EARLY! If the ballet begins at 2pm, do not pull into the parking lot at 1:55. Sufficient time is needed to find your seat and get settled. Trust me when I say that finding your seat in the dark is quite difficult, especially if you are in the middle.

2.) THOU SHALL NOT WEAR JEANS!!! Simply put, Sunday dress is best. What you wear to a football game is not appropriate for attending the theater!

3.) THOU SHALL LEAVE ALL CELLULAR DEVICES IN THE CAR!! I know this one is terribly hard to understand, but will it harm you to go 2 hrs without talking to Aunt Betty?

4.) THOU SHALL LEAVE CHILDREN UNDER THE AGE OF 4 AT HOME! In theory, it may seem like a fun idea, but in reality, are they really going to be able to sit in a seat QUIETLY for two + hrs? A better idea might be to take them to a 'Wiggles' concert. They allow you to get up during that performance!

5.) THOU SHALL KNOW WHERE THY SEAT IS LOCATED! Look at your ticket and find the section, row, and seat number. Now, if you have any further questions, ask the ushers. That is what they are there for! It can be quite embarassing accusing someone that they are in your seat, only to figure out that YOU are in the wrong section!

6.) THOU SHALL USE COMMON COURTESY WHEN "CRAWLING" OVER OTHERS TO GET TO THY SEAT!! " Excuse me"," I am sorry for the inconvenience", and" thank you" are generally well accepted by the theater crowd. And why would you wait until intermission is almost over and people are settled back in their seats, to decide it is time to get up?

7.) IF THOU ARE BLESSED WITH HEIGHT, THOU SHALL KINDLY REFRAIN FROM CONSTANT HEAD MOVEMENT. This is especially considerate, when the people seated behind you are small in stature. Remember, we can't see THROUGH your head.

8.) THOU SHALL REFRAIN FROM ALL PUBLIC DISPLAYS OF AFFECTION DURING THE PERFORMANCE. Save the hugging, snuggling, kissing, sweet nothings, etc, etc for the privacy of your home. People are there to see a ballet performance, not watch a re-enactment of "Love Story'.


10.) THOU SHALL REFRAIN FROM TELLING "OFF COLOR" STORIES, WITHIN EARSHOT OF OTHERS. The ballet scene is not the same as the 'Bar' scene!

In case you are wondering, I experienced all of the above on Sunday. I may sound mean and irritable, but I am just tired of people not using common sense and some manners! I paid so much money for our tickets and we didn't have a very good view because of #7 and #8. It was quite frustrating, but I feel SO much better getting this off my chest! :) Maybe I have helped edjucate someone!


Jennifer said...

Love it! Love it! And I would like to add the "do's" and "don'ts" of drivers etiquette, but I'll save that for another day! LOL

Andrea said...

Oh I would love to read that!!! Do share! ;)

Diane said...

Oh my gosh, I know!!!!!!

At our orchestra concert the two professional teachers were playing a few movements in a row...people started CHEERING between movements! First off, you don't CHEER and second you wait until the entire piece is done...sheesh! LOL